ADHD body doubling: good for starting, harder for carrying on

A few years ago one of my goals was to start a regular meditation practice. The app I was using had a session (a morning one, for me) that was broadcast worldwide, so all its users sat down at the same moment wherever they were. It even told you how many people were meditating at the same time as you.

It was genuinely comforting to know there were other people doing exactly the same thing all over the world, and quite a few of them. That gave me a sense of community, and it helped.

Then, after managing it a few times, I fell off. And because I had got used to doing it as part of a group, I wasn't nearly as motivated to carry on alone later in the day as I had been in the group session. It didn't stick.

That is absolutely not the fault of the app, and it is not a flaw in the idea. It is life getting in the way, as it always tends to do.

What strikes me about it now is that this one wasn't even venue-dependent. It was all virtual. And I still couldn't quite stick to it.

A lot of people who feel challenged by the idea of starting something, especially something significant, like writing a book, turn to a technique called body doubling.

The idea is that you agree with one or more other people to meet at a given place at a given time, sit down, and get to work on your own project, but at the same time. Usually in silence, and usually for a set period, like half an hour or an hour.

It takes many forms. There are writers' cafés. There are academic groups that meet to work on their papers. There are people who like arts and crafts who get together to do them.

The short version

Does someone else need to be there?

There's no question that accountability is a good thing. Having someone else there who can be there for you at the same time as you're there for them, while you're both working on something that matters to you, is definitely a good thing.

But to what extent do we actually need to have another person present in order to get ourselves started?

The friction

There's a lot of friction attached to it.

One of you might be unavailable, for a valid reason or not. The venue you had in mind might be too busy, too noisy, too crowded, or simply not available that day and time. You might have to travel a long way to reach it.

When you're facing something challenging, any amount of early friction can (often, though not always) interfere with your motivation. It gives you one additional layer of justification for why today might not be the day you start.

And then the session ends

There's a second thing. Even if you have managed to start, the continuation of the project is something you alone can carry. The murky middle of a project is difficult.

So it becomes one of two possibilities. Either you make your way through that middle by yourself, or you start to become reliant, to some extent, on the group structure that got you started in the first place. That is what happened to me with the meditation.

When it did work

When I started my first faculty position, three of us, who were in exactly the same place but worked in different departments, decided to organise a little support circle for each other. We exchanged bits of our writing for constructive criticism, and we sat down and wrote together for about an hour every other week.

I found that extremely helpful. It meant I made progress on projects I had been putting off, and the ones I brought to that group have in the end seen the light of day, which may not have happened without it. I am still in touch with the people who were part of it, and I am grateful for it.

They weren't my most challenging projects, though. Those would have needed a lot more than an hour of focused time, and that was its own challenge.

So: use it, and have something else too

Definitely use body doubling as a way to start. Definitely use accountability as a source of motivation. And definitely take the time to build a community around the goals that matter to you.

At the same time, use the simpler solutions already available to you.

We hope Herding Chickens is one of them: a simple, well-integrated design that helps you pick the important item for the day, and gently nudges you to keep going with it over time.

The first version runs in Telegram; there's no store download yet. Join the waitlist for a launch email.

Keep reading

• ADHD accountability: why it can't be another person
• ADHD finishing tasks: the murky middle is not a sign something's wrong
• ADHD one task at a time: why only one main
• ADHD task paralysis: break it down instead of "just do it"
• ADHD executive dysfunction: the harder route you take to avoid the hard thing
• More on Task Paralysis

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Herding Chickens is a productivity app in development, not medical advice, therapy, or an ADHD diagnosis. If you are struggling, talk to a qualified clinician. In the UK, start with the NHS ADHD in adults page.